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What is love? When looking up this word in Webster’s Dictionary several definitions are used to describe this profound word. Love can be “a strong affection, a warm attachment, an attraction based on sexual desire, a beloved person, and an unselfishly loyal and benevolent concern for others.” Love is a very diverse topic, as discovered in the short story by Raymond Carver, What We Talk About When We Talk About Love. The characters within this short story argue that love is spiritual, painstaking, a feeling to describe someone whom one enjoys being around, a way to describe a feeling that never lasts forever, and a feeling that causes one to die without their loved one. Love is a feeling so strong that it molds us into our very being.

Mel Mc Ginnis, a character from the short story, What We Talk About When We Talk About Love, believes that love is “nothing less than spiritual love.” Mel had drawn this conclusion from information he had gathered while attending a seminary before going to Medical school. These were, as he said, the most “important years of his life”, and therefore had a strong influence on his opinions. However, Mel’s belief of the meaning of love is different from that of his second wife, Terri’s.

Terri’s conviction about love was different from her friend’s sitting around the table and drinking gin and tonic. She had fabricated her opinion based on her experiences with her ex boyfriend, Ed. Love is painstaking. Terri told her friends that Ed had loved her so much that he “tried to kill her.” When describing a memory, Terri tells her friends how Ed pulled her by her ankles while saying, “I love you, I love you, you Bitch!” Terri says that Ed truly loved her, and she knew this because his reaction to love caused pain. Love “was there” she argued to Mel when he had refused to believe her. Her friends, however, had other outlooks about love.

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Ray Carver believes that love is absolute. While he watched his friend’s argue about this subject, he affectionately caressed his wife, Laura’s hand. He silently thought of his and Laura’s relationship. “In addition to being in love,” he profoundly thought, “We like each other and enjoy one another’s company.” This was Ray’s beautiful way of describing what love is. Once again Mel took his turn in speaking during the argument.

Whether it was the gin and tonic Mel had been drinking that caused him to create a myth about love, or maybe a few inside beliefs that finally showed themselves due to the alcohol, in either case, Mel told his friends a new theory about love. What if love was a word to describe a short feeling for someone/ something until someone/ something better came along, thus leaving the old “love” categorized in our minds as a memory? “What happened to the “love” that once existed for the other people?” Mel asks his drunken friends. “I must have loved my first wife too,” he declared, “and now I hate her guts.” What if love isn’t as strong as we make it out to be?

Next, Mel describes to his friends a powerful form of love. He tells a story about an old couple terribly wounded in a car accident by a young drunken boy. Somehow, the couple amazingly lived through the severe injuries the car accident caused them to have. Then, Mel told them that the old man and his wife were bandaged from head-to- toe. Being in better condition than his wife, the old man fell into a deep depression because he was unable to turn his head and look at his wife. “I’m telling you,” Mel said to his friends, “the man’s heart was breaking because he couldn’t turn his goddamn head and see his goddamn wife.” Mel’s story reveals the power about what true love can do to us.

In conclusion, the characters of the story What We Talk About When We Talk About Love had all decided that love could be shown whether it is in a spiritual, painstaking, an absolute form, or an effect that causes us to feel lonely without our loved ones. Love may not even be true at all as Mel Mc Ginnis has observed. Or, maybe there is no real definition for the word love since Ray Carver never concludes about what love truly is. However, I truly believe that love exists, and I know it does because I have lived indefinable experiences that I would call “love.” Love is a beautiful way of describing a magical feeling we, as humans, discover when meeting a special someone or something in our life. Love is a feeling that lasts forever and can never be taken away from us or categorized into a simple memory. Love can make one feel endless happiness and become full of life. If the person we had once loved were ever to pass away, if this love were true, the person would never forget their lover even if they discovered another that they had come to love. I do not agree with Mel or Terri about love being shown through abuse, or thinking that love may not have a truthful meaning. However, I do believe the story about the old couple that was in love with one another. This shows how powerful love can truly be. It does exist. Love may indicate several different descriptions, however, I know that one thing is true about this mystery word…Love is forever!

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